


Two Hunters, An Angel, and a Road Trip

by Huntress69



Series: Two Hunters and An Angel [2]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, First Time, Humor, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-03-12
Updated: 2013-03-12
Packaged: 2017-12-05 02:09:40
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,913
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/717646
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Huntress69/pseuds/Huntress69
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Castiel's <i>recovery</i> is not without side-effects</p>
            </blockquote>





	Two Hunters, An Angel, and a Road Trip

Dean returned with a bag of food and a bottle for Castiel, and frowned when he saw where Castiel was - laying on the bed with Sam, his head resting on Sam's chest, while Sam stroked his hair. "Drink up, oh winged one."

Castiel half sat and studied the bottle. "It is pink."

"How very astute of you," Dean snickered. "Just swig and you'll feel better."

As he slowly swallowed, Castiel's breathing evened out. "I am better now." He glanced at Sam. "I will try again." A look of deep concentration came over him, slowly morphing to a look of defeat. "I still can't do it, Sam."

Sam sipped at his coffee. "Are you sure?"

"Do what?" Dean asked. "Look, Cas, much as we, er, like you, it's time for you to just fly away, or poof, or whatever it is you do when you leave."

"I thought you wanted a trip to Las Vegas, Dean?" Castiel asked quietly.

"Next time," Dean said, "not now, 'cause me and Sammy have some work to do on the Impala's trunk."

Sam spewed his coffee. "Dean, he's been trying, but he can't leave." 

"It appears I am...stuck," Castiel added with a small shrug.

"Yeah, well be stuck elsewhere, 'cause **we're** leaving." Dean began to throw things in their duffels. 

"I am still suffering," Castiel explained. "I am ill."

"You're not ill," Dean said softly. "You're," he leaned in closely to Castiel's ear, " **HUNG OVER!** "

Castiel buried his face in Sam's chest. "Why must he scream?"

"Because he's a sadist." Sam couldn't help it; the laugh came before he could stop it.

"And why is he in bed with you?" Dean's eyes narrowed. "Answer me that, Sam."

"Because I wanted to give him comfort, you putz!" Sam snapped. 

"Please do not leave me here," Castiel pleaded.

"Yeah, okay," Dean nodded. He waited for Castiel to smile before he added, "We'll check you into a Sheraton or something." Two sets of puppy-dog eyes focused on him. "What?"

"We need to take him with us, Dean," Sam said. 

"Yes, you need to take me with you, Dean," Castiel parroted.

"Fine, we'll take you." Dean huffed. "But if anybody asks, you're my accountant."

**~~~~~~~~**

Bobby called a short while after they left, informing them that he had a new batch of silver bullets for them. Since they were already on the road, all it took was one u-turn and they were headed to South Dakota. 

Sam read a book while Castiel took in the scenery. 

Unfortunately the angel had a comment about **everything**. "A cow goes moo." "That green car is going fast." "What is a mile marker?" "Why is that woman showing me her breasts?"

"What woman?!" Dean shouted, nearly running them off the road.

"The car she was in just exited this road," Castiel told him. 

"Great," Dean sighed. 

"I'm hungry," Sam whined. "We haven't stopped in three hours."

"Fine!" Dean took the next off-ramp. "We're only about an hour from Bobby's and I'm drinking, so you can drive the rest of the way."

"It's not even three o'clock, Dean," Sam said. "A bit early to drink, isn't it?"

Dean just shot him a dirty look and pulled into the first restaurant/bar to park. As they got out, he gave Castiel a warning. "Don't be telling people you're an angel or anything."

"I am your accountant," Castiel nodded, "your numbers cruncher, your auditor, your cash manager, your...."

"Accountant will be just fine," Sam laughed. 

**~~~~~~~~**

The meal was quiet, and Castiel ate non-stop, devouring more food than Dean and Sam combined. "I am still hungry. I want some of those." He pointed to a nearby table. 

"Those are French fries, Cas," Sam explained.

"I will have them next." The fries appeared in front of Castiel.

Sam noticed the plate was half empty, and glanced at the other table - the plate that had been there was gone. "Oh no."

"What is it, Sam?" Dean asked, half-panicked.

"Castiel has his powers, but I think...."

"I want what that girl has." Castiel nodded to another table and a half-drunken milk-shake; it also appeared in front of him.

"Dean," Sam half-laughed, "I think his...power...mojo...grace, whatever, I think it's sort of...on the fritz." He explained what he'd seen.

"We'll deal," Dean chuckled a bit. "What could possibly go wrong?" He stared at the bottle. "Straight Jagermeister." Dean showed the bottle to the angel. "The rough translation is, _This is the hunter's badge of glory, that he protect and tend his quarry, hunt with honor as is due, and through the beast to God is true._ " He was about to pour.

"Dean, that stuff is awful straight-up," Sam told him. "Have a Jager Bomb, okay?"

"Okay, Sam," Dean reluctantly agreed. "I'll flag down the waiter for some Red Bull."

"Not necessary," Castiel added. "I shall procure the Red Bull for you, to prove that my grace is not...on the fritz." He smiled at the brothers, concentrated...and a massive, half ton bull, bright red in color, appeared in the middle of the bar. "Perhaps Sam was correct." 

While Sam buried his face in his arms mumbling "I told you so" over and over, and the people around them shrieked in panic, Dean was completely uncaring. "I'll be impressed if you make it into steaks."

Castiel brightened. "I can do that."

"NO!" Sam yanked him out of his seat. "No more. It's bad enough these people are going to need psychiatric help for the rest of their lives." He dragged Castiel from the restaurant.

Dean glanced around and nobody was paying attention to him, so he walked out with the bottle. Since he didn't get a chance to drink, he opted to continue the drive, went to the door and searched for his keys. When he couldn't find them, he glanced inside the car, and saw them on the front seat. "Shit, I thought I put the keys in my pocket. Now I'm gonna have to break into my own damn car."

"There is no need for that. I shall open the car for you, Dean, so that you may retrieve your keys." Castiel focused his attention on the door.

**CRASH**

The driver's side window shattered. 

"MY BABY!" Dean shrieked and lunged at Castiel. "I'LL KILL YOU!" 

Sam managed to grab Dean, but was having a hard time restraining him.

Seeing the fury in Dean's eyes, Castiel quickly said, "I can fix it!" More concentration and yes, the Impala's window was whole again, and the door open. Unfortunately every piece of glass nearby shattered at the same time.

Sam let Dean go, and frowned at Castiel. "I don't think you should use your...grace...for the moment."

"I think he should go play in traffic." Dean got into the car. "We'll let him out on the Interstate."

"Sam, what does it mean to _play in traffic_ "? 

**~~~~~~~~**

"Are we there yet?"

"No."

"Are we there yet?"

"No."

"Are we there yet?"

"No, Cas, we're **not** there yet!" Dean was grinding his teeth. "So quit fucking asking!"

"I was under the impression that when one is on a road trip, one must ask that again and again," Castiel replied.

"Only if you have a death wish."

**~~~~~~~~**

Bobby was quite happy to see 'his boys' but was less than thrilled to see Castiel. "The war's over, go home."

"I am apparently unable to," Castiel shrugged. "I am stuck here."

"Oh, ain't that swell," Bobby sneered. "If it's not demons, it's angels. Can't you boys have normal friends?"

Dean took their duffels out of the trunk. "We're Winchester's; this is normal."

Castiel peered over Dean's shoulder. "Can I use one of those?"

"You want a gun?" Sam asked. "I thought angels were pacifists by...nature?"

"You have been watching too much Roma Downey," Castiel answered, picking up a 38 special. "We can kick ass with the best of them."

"What have you boys been teaching him?" Bobby asked.

"The last time I was here," Castiel studied the gun, "I found time to watch a lot of TV. I am a fan of Clint Eastwood's."

"So what." Bobby rolled his eyes.

"I also enjoy John Wayne. The Duke is, I believe the correct phrasing would be, totally awesome." Castiel pointed the gun and drawled, " _I never shot nobody I didn't have to._ " He smiled. "That is from _True Grit_ , an excellent motion picture if I may say so."

"You can stay," Bobby snickered. "But only if you stop doing impressions of my idol." He put his finger on the gun, lowering it. "And you don't point guns unless you're going to shoot."

"I would like to shoot," Castiel said. "May I?"

"We might as well make sure he knows how, Dean," Sam said with a small shrug. 

"I'm gonna regret this," Dean said, but nodded in agreement. "C'mon, we'll set up a marksman range."

**~~~~~~~~**

The cans were lined up and Dean took out his Beretta. "I'll show you how it's done." He fired five rounds, hitting each can, while Sam put up five more.

"I can do that." Castiel aimed...and missed each can.

"I believe mine is defective." Castiel stared at the gun.

"Take my Magnum 44," Sam grinned. "It's the gun of Dirty Harry."

Castiel smirked. "Those cans shall make my day." He missed again.

Dean sighed and handed him the Beretta. "This one might be easier."

Castiel pointed, narrowed his eyes, gritted his teeth, fired, hit the first can, but missed the rest. "Your weapons are all...defective!" He flung the gun to the ground.

"Maybe **you're** defective," Dean mumbled. 

"I am worthless without my grace." Castiel sniffled. "I will go and 'play in traffic' as you suggested earlier." 

Dean banged his head against the hood of the car and looked upwards. "You gave me nimble wit, snappy comebacks and awesome looks. Who the hell needed a conscience?" He stared after Castiel. "Cas, wait!" Dean went to the trunk and pulled out another gun. 

"It is useless, Dean. I am a failure as a hunter." Castiel looked towards the road. "Perhaps one of those large trucks will come along and it will be quick and painless. I will miss Jimmy's vessel, but I will...deal."

"I like that vessel and you're stuck with it." Dean handed the gun to the angel. "If you don't hit anything, we'll...we'll work it out, I promise." He pulled Sam over. "You, uh, work with him, on his aim. I'll be right back."

"Okay, Cas," Sam said, standing behind him, "just relax your arm, take aim, and fire."

"I cannot...."

"Give it one more try."

Castiel nodded and squeezed the trigger - the can flew. "I did it."

"Again," Sam told him.

Three more shots and Castiel hit each can. "I hit the targets, Sam." He was very excited. "All of them!"

"So you did."

"Where is Dean?"

Dean walked over with a grin. "Sam's a good teacher."

Castiel held the gun tightly. "May I keep it?"

"We'll call it a temporary loaner, until you can work your magic again with no screw-ups."

"I would like some more food," Castiel smiled. 

"Go on; I'm sure Bobby will give you some." Dean motioned to the house. "We'll be there shortly."

As Castiel walked away, Sam grinned at Dean. 

"I saw you, Dean." 

Dean tried his best to look innocent. "Saw what, Sammy?"

"You, hiding over there, firing at the same time he did."

Dean kicked at the dirt. "Yeah, well, we can't have an angel playing in traffic now, can we?"

"Nope." Sam leaned against the Impala. "And may I remind you that you have work to do on the trunk."

"Uh-huh." Dean lifted Sam to sit on the trunk and stood between his legs. "So I do." He framed Sam's face in his palms. "All these years, all the men, all the women, and what I needed was right in front of me, right beside me." He leaned in. "How could I have been so blind?" 

"That was almost...quasi-poetic," Sam cracked. "What movie did you steal it from?"

"Hey, I can do hearts and flowers and mushy stuff if I want to."

"You're a sap, Dean Winchester." Sam licked his lips. "Now kiss me, you fool."

"A romantic fool, just for you." Dean moaned as his lips crashed upon Sam's. 

Sam pushed him back after a minute, gasping for air. "Give a guy a chance to breathe, would ya?"

"You wuss," Dean snickered and pulled Sam's shirt off. He kissed down to Sam's neck, sucking hard until he was sure he'd left a bruise, bit each nipple and deftly undid Sam's pants, lowering them. He fisted Sam's dick as it sprang free from the confines of the denim. "I love touching you." Dean pulled Sam off the trunk and bent him over it, leaving a trail of kisses down Sam's back, reaching his ass, kissing each cheek, and then bit down. Sam jumped at the first bite, and Dean chuckled. "Your ass is mine." His tongue slid in and Sam arched his body, but Dean just held him tighter around the hips. "Stay still." 

Sam forced himself to do that, but it was taking every ounce of willpower he had, which wasn't much at that point. 

Dean was hard himself, and got to his feet, undoing his own pants. "Oh fuck!"

Sam realized those were not words of passion. "What?"

"No lube, I can't...."

"Spit, Dean, use spit, don't care...just fuck me...."

"Tsk, tsk, Sammy, language."

"Dammit Dean! I am out of patience!" 

"Okay, okay...." Dean spit on his hand and slicked himself as best he could. "This might hurt a little, baby."

"I like baby," Sam shifted himself backwards, "and I love you."

Dean entered slow, gripping one of Sam's hips to hold him steady. "I've got you, Sammy." Sam **was** tight, and Dean moved at a snail's pace; the last thing he wanted was to cause any real pain. He reached down and took Sam's dick in his fist, jerking him slowly. "Good now, baby?"

"Oh yeah...better than good...."

They were moving at the same rhythm, and when Sam tilted his head back, Dean leaned in and bit him on the shoulder. 

That was all it took for Sam to come hard, all over Dean's hand and all over the trunk. 

Dean gave one last thrust and came inside Sam and he didn't stop moving until he was out of breath. He slowly pulled back, turned Sam and gave him a sloppy kiss. "Just so you know, I love you too, Sammy." 

"Icky-sticky," Sam laughed.

Dean took off his shirt and cleaned them both. "Semi-clean now."

"I suppose I have to clean up the trunk?" Sam teased. 

"Nope." Dean smirked as he picked up Sam's shirt. "But your shirt will." He wiped it down before Sam could stop him. 

"I hate you."

"No you don't." Dean flung his arm around Sam's shoulders as they went back to the house. "The only person you ever hated was that weatherman on channel 16 in Iowa, the one who predicted sunshine and we got a tornado."

They shared one last kiss before they went inside, and Dean looked around. "Where's Castiel?"

Bobby pointed. "Your angel's sacked out on the couch snoring louder than a moose in heat." He gave them both a small smile. "It's good to see the two of you. I know it's early, but I got your rooms set up."

"Rooms," Dean said. "Yeah, uh, Bobby, I think...you may throw us out over this, but me and Sam...."

"Sam and I," Sam corrected, and finished for him. "We're sleeping together."

"Fine with me," Bobby said nonchalantly. "But you prevent me from getting my required beauty sleep and I kill you both. And if you break the bed I shoot ya."

"You don't care?" Dean asked, eyes widened in shock.

"Boy, I have more important things to worry about than who you're screwing. And at least with you two, I know it's gotta be love and not lust."

Sam gave him a big hug. "Love you."

"Yeah, yeah, I'm just wonderful." Bobby gave them both a big smile. "And if you're not going to bed, I got a deck of cards all ready for you."

"First we get changed," Dean smirked, "then we clean you out, old man."

**~~~~~~~~**

Sam came downstairs in the morning and began to sniff the air. 

"Bobby," Sam asked, "I smell roses."

"Blame him," Bobby nodded to Castiel, "and look in there." He pointed to the living room.

Sam turned and saw a sea of color, then turned to Bobby, a questioning look on his face.

"I made pancakes...." Bobby started.

"Cool!" 

"Not cool," Bobby glared at Castiel. "Miss Piggy here ate all of them and wanted more. I told him I was out of flour and he kindly offered to get me some."

Sam couldn't control his giggles. "And you ended up with a roomful of **flowers**."

"It was an accident," Castiel said softly. "I was trying to be helpful."

"Bobby...." Sam gave him the puppy-eyes.

"Don't make them eyes at me, Sam, I already forgave him. It's kinda hard to stay mad at somebody who is genuinely sorry." Bobby opened the freezer. "Bagel with cream cheese?"

"Fine." Sam poured himself a cup of coffee. "You have anything for an upset stomach? Dean threw up."

"I'm not surprised," Bobby said. "I heard him in the kitchen a half dozen times last night. My cupboard is nearly bare thanks to the bottomless pit."

"SAM!!"

At Dean's scream, Sam flew upstairs, finding Dean kneeling on the floor, holding his side. "I think I wrenched something, Sammy; it hurts like a bitch." 

Sam batted his hands away and pulled up Dean's shirt. "I don't know what you did, but your gut is all red."

"I'll call 911," Bobby said, going for the phone.

"No, no hospital," Dean shook his head. "We have no insurance and wanted men can't get medical help."

"Your FBI records were...expunged...at the end of the war," Castiel informed them. "Neither one of you is wanted by the authorities any longer."

"Fine, but we still gotta pay," Dean pointed out. "And I don't have enough credit on any of my credit cards."

Sam smiled as he helped Dean to his feet. "Dad's insurance will cover us."

"Dad?"

"He's a veteran, Dean. When we were kids he used to get medical insurance from the VA, and as his survivors, we're entitled."

"Okay," Dean groaned, "but no ambulance."

**~~~~~~~~**

Dean took a seat at the intake desk and the nurse smiled.

"What can I do for you?"

"He needs a doctor," Sam said. 

"I figured that's why he was here," she said. "What seems to be the problem?"

"I'm in pain," Dean snarled, "that's what the problem is."

"Insurance?"

"We're on our father's VA insurance - John Winchester." Sam rifled his wallet. "I have the card somewhere...."

She typed the name into her computer. "I have a John Winchester who was in here a few years back."

"That's right," Bobby told her. "John needed to get patched up after an...accident." 

"So you have his insurance information, and as his sons, we are covered, aren't we?" Sam asked.

"Yes, but I'll need some ID to prove who you are."

Sam went through Dean's wallet, finally finding a license with his real name and photo on it. "Here."

"Can I have some drugs?" Dean asked quietly. "Preferably Tylenol with codeine?"

The nurse called an orderly over to take Dean into the back while Sam finished up with the forms.

**~~~~~~~~**

The doctor came out about 15 minutes later to talk to Sam. "It appears to be appendicitis, but we're going to run a few more tests. In the meanwhile, we gave your brother some painkillers, but he is insistent his appendix was removed."

"Re-hymenated," Sam murmured to himself. He looked at the doctor. "I'll go talk to him." Sam went into the examining room and his heart dropped. Dean's eyes were glazed over from the drugs and he was pale as a ghost. "Hey."

"Sammy, I wanna go home." Dean sniffled and he looked close to tears. "I hate hospitals. I don't wanna die." He paused. "Again."

"You're not going to die, ya big baby," Sam soothed, although he did understand Dean's fear of hospitals. "They think it's your appendix."

"As I told that quack - not possible, dumbass." Dean wiped away a tear - oh yeah, he was flying on the drugs. "I got it taken out on your 14th birthday."

"Dean, when Castiel brought you back, everything was fixed, remember?" Sam gave him a wan smile. "The only thing the same was the protective sigil on your chest."

Dean switched gears, from mopey to murderous. "You mean he gave me another appendix?"

"Apparently."

"That's reason number 163 to kill that loopy angel."

Sam sat beside him, holding his hand. "They're going to remove it...again...and I am going to be here when you wake up."

"You promise you won't leave, Sammy?" Dean squeezed his hand. "Swear to Jimmy Page?"

Sam leaned down and kissed him. "And to Bon Scott too." He pulled away but was dragged back down by his shirt.

"Don't let 'em take out anything else, Sam."

"Uh, like what?"

Dean looked around. "Kidneys, Sam," he whispered. "There's a black market for them."

Sam was well aware if he laughed there would be no stopping Dean from getting up and walking out, so he kept calm. "I'll make sure you have both your kidneys when they're done."

"And my liver and spleen, too," Dean added.

"Of course, Dean," Sam agreed. "There's a big black market for spleens."

"I read about it in the Weekly World News."

"Me too." Sam lay Dean back down. "Now, will you let the nice medical personnel take care of you?"

"Hello, Dean," Castiel said from the doorway. "How are you feeling?"

Dean tried to get up, grimaced from the sharp pain and fell back. "When I am better, I am flaying the skin from that vessel of yours."

"You put him back together fresh and new when you...raised him from Perdition," Sam explained. "This means another appendix, which he has to have removed."

"AGAIN!"

Castiel bit at his lower lip. "I am sorry, I...I...."

"I want two hours in a casino," Dean told him. 

"Done," Castiel immediately agreed, "and I shall also procure you a suite at the finest hotel." 

"For a week, with room service."

Castiel silently nodded and bowed his head; he already felt lousy about everything.

"C'mon," Sam led Castiel out of the room, "I'll buy you a couple of candy bars while we wait."

**~~~~~~~~**

The doctor came out a short while later with a smile. "It's not appendicitis after all."

"Then what is it?" Sam asked, relieved. 

"A case of food poisoning, which explains the abdominal pain, and an allergic reaction to something, which caused the redness."

"Can we see him?"

"Yes you can, but we'd like to keep him overnight, because he still has a slight fever." The doctor paused. "Oh, there is one other thing...."

"What?" Sam's face fell.

"Can you please reassure him we didn't do anything and that he has all his body parts?" The doctor snickered. "Yes, I read the Weekly World News also."

**~~~~~~~~**

"Hi, bro'." Sam came into the room, a grin on his face. "You'll be happy to know it wasn't your appendix, and all your body parts are where they should be."

"Then what was it?" Dean tried to sit up. "And if it's not, I'm leaving."

"Food poisoning." Sam sat down and gave him a kiss. "And you're staying overnight. Now, what exactly did you eat all those times you hit the kitchen last night?"

Dean had to think for a moment. "A peanut butter sandwich, a bag of Funyons, four Yodels, uh...leftover pasta salad, two pickles...."

"Yecchh!"

"....a bowl of Cocoa Puffs, a corn muffin and a hunk of bleu cheese."

"I'm amazed you didn't explode." Sam sighed, and began to think. "Bleu cheese?"

"Yeah," Dean shrugged, "I spread it on some Doritos."

Sam felt his own stomach churning; Dean's eating habits were going to be the death of him one day. "Dean, that wasn't Bleu cheese, it was **blue** cheese!"

"That's what I said!"

"Dean, Bobby's taking some courses at the university. That cheese was **supposed** to be blue, as in the color; it was moldy for his science homework."

Dean laughed a little. "It tasted fine when I ate it."

"That's probably due to being raised on Dad's cooking. We could probably eat styrofoam and not notice the taste was off."

"You did that when you were six, Sammy." 

"And Mrs. Slocombe threw up when she saw me putting ketchup on it."

The two were in the midst of a laughing fit when Castiel entered. 

"Bobby had to leave." He looked Dean over. "You are well?"

"Just peachy-keen," Dean grinned, and checked his IV. "I love these auto-drug systems; it appears they are kicking in."

Sam glanced at Castiel. "Now, what should I do with him tonight?"

"I dunno, Sam, take him to a strip club or something." Dean was slowly growing dopey from the drugs. "Get him a lap dance."

"I'll see you in the morning, big brother." Sam placed a kiss to his forehead. "I love you."

"Such a girl, Samantha," Dean giggled. 

As they left the room, Castiel asked, "What is a lap dance?"

"Don't even think it," Sam told him. He called Bobby to let him know what happened, and asked for help with Castiel, but was turned down - Bobby had a hot date. "Great." Sam turned to Castiel. "We're only going to a bar because we are in need of cash, and no, you are not getting a lap dance."

"Will you be shooting pool?"

"I don't shoot pool, Castiel." Sam cracked his knuckles. "I do darts."

**~~~~~~~~**

Sam found a nice quiet club and sat Castiel in a booth.

Castiel got up and walked to the bar. "I like to observe people, Sam. I will sit here," he sat on a stool, "and I will not move at all. You have my word."

"No Jager Bombs," Sam warned.

"Never again," Castiel agreed. "But I wouldn't mind a beer. I like beer."

"Just one."

"Just one, Sam."

Satisfied, Sam waded through the crowd toward the back, and the various games going on.

**~~~~~~~~**

Sam finished his third game, along with three shots of tequila, pocketed his money and returned to the bar, standing beside Castiel. "You stayed away from alcohol, right?"

"I had one beer, Sam." Castiel smirked. "Just one, I swear." He stood closer to Sam, close enough that Sam felt his hot breath.

"Uh, personal space, Castiel." 

Castiel reached out and petted Sam's hair. "Your hair is soft and very sexy."

Sam was buzzed, and not in a major way, but Castiel...."Castiel, is something wrong?"

"Nothing at all, Sam." Castiel pressed up close against Sam...very close. 

"Cas, it's called personal space, okay!" He turned to settle up his bar tab when Castiel began to pet his hair again...and blow in his ear. Turning back, Sam leaned in and whispered, "If you pet me one more time, I swear to Christ I will strip you, bend you over that table and...." 

Castiel's reaction was to nibble on his ear. 

Sam wiped his hands over his face and wondered if Rod Serling was lurking about. "It was only one beer." He placed his palm on Castiel's chest, holding him at arm's length, and waved the bartender over, holding out two 20's. "Three shots of tequila and his beer."

"His beer was already taken care of," the bartender nodded to the end of the bar, "by them."

Sam took a look at the two kids (well, to him they were kids) standing there, staring at Castiel and laughing. It took a few seconds, but the light bulb went off over his head and he stormed over and grabbed one by the shirt, towering over him. "What did you put in my friend's beer?"

The kid swallowed hard, afraid of Sam's height alone, let alone the anger on his face. "Just a little GHB, man, and a hit of X," he whimpered. "He needed to loosen up."

"We were just fucking with the taxman dude," the other one added. "He was too stiff."

"You gave him GHB?" Sam stared at them. "And Ecstasy?" He was half-tempted to shoot them both, but the sounds of Castiel's laugh made him turn. He saw the angel getting close to a woman and forgot about the kids. "He's taken," Sam told her, brushing her off. He wasn't sure what to do, and really didn't want to call Dean, but that was his only option. Sam was thankful he'd left Dean with his cell, and he reluctantly called. "We have a problem, Dean."

"You're a big boy, Sammy, and I am too stoned to help you. These drugs are fucking awesome!"

"Some kids doped Castiel up and I don't know what to do!"

"WHAT?" Dean sat up, ready to check himself out. "What did they give him?"

"GHB and Ecstasy, they thought it would...loosen him up. I **really** don't know what to do; he's all hands..." Sam batted Castiel's hands away from his crotch, "...and he won't stop touching me." Sam heard the raucous laughter on the other end of the phone. "You think this is funny?"

It took Dean a moment to calm down. "No, Sam, I don't. Well, not really." He started to laugh again.

"What am I supposed to do?" Sam's ass was groped and he cursed under his breath.

"I don't think it's gonna kill him, so just deal with it any way you have to." Dean paused. "Do a little research, and watch out for any warning signs of danger. If he doesn't show 'em...."

"In case you didn't hear, Castiel is **TOUCHING** me." He flushed pink as a few heads stared at him.

"And in case **you** didn't hear **me** ," Dean said, "deal with it. Now let me enjoy the drugs I was given for my pain and I'll see you tomorrow." He hung up and started to laugh again. He'd never personally taken GHB or Ecstasy - those particular drugs were not for him. But as a norm they weren't deadly, and Sam would do the research and know what to look for. But if all that happened was Castiel got overly horny, Sam was going to have his hands full. "And why aren't you jealous, Dean?" he asked himself. "Because it's Castiel," he answered to the air. "How could I be jealous of an angel?" Satisfied, he attempted to give himself more pain-killers from the IV-Drip, but the thing was set up for every four hours. He fiddled with it and a short while later was enjoying a euphoric, intense, and perfectly legal, high.

**~~~~~~~~**

"Okay, Sam, you can do this. If you deal with demons out to kill you, maim you, tear you to pieces, you can deal with a horny angel." He took a deep breath and faced Castiel. "Castiel...."

"Yes, Sam?" Castiel was all moony. 

Sam grabbed him by the arm. "We're getting out of here." He barreled through the crowd, shooting one last look at the kids who had drugged up Castiel. He memorized their faces and would ensure they got theirs in due time. 

"They were mean." Castiel pouted and turned around. "IMPOTENCY UPON YOU BOTH!"

"Oh shit," Sam muttered, thinking about Castiel's current 'state of grace', "I hope their dicks don't fall off." Out in the parking lot, Sam tried to open the car door, but Castiel was glued to him. "I have to open the door."

Castiel moved back, and the moment the door was open he pushed Sam inside the front seat, onto his back and crawled on top of him. "I want you, Sam." Castiel looked like a rabid dog. "I want your body with mine, naked flesh caressing naked flesh." 

The angel was rutting against him and Sam was left with absolutely **no** doubt of what Castiel had in mind. "Not here," he said quickly. "We, uh, could get arrested."

Thankfully Castiel backed off.

"And, uh, you have to sit in the back seat for the ride." Sam was hoping that Castiel would pass out along the way.

"I'll give you a blow-job if you want."

Sam opened his mouth twice, but no words were forthcoming.

"That is the correct phrase, is it not?"

"Well, yeah, but you're a...a...." Sam flapped his arms and pointed up.

"I believe I told you I spent time in Sodom. Did you think I went there to look at the pretty people?" He pressed up against Sam again. "My last vessel was quite...well-endowed. Not as nice as Jimmy Novak though."

"Thank you for that information." Sam opened the back door. "Now get in the back and lay down or I stuff you in the trunk."

Castiel slid in and lay down. "I want to have sex with you, Sam."

"Of course you do," Sam nodded, hoping to humor him. "And if there was a sheep here...."

"Bestiality is not a..." Castiel thought for a moment. "...turn-on for me."

Sam closed the door. "Lucky me." He got in and started the engine, turning around as Castiel was sitting up. "Lay down!" 

Castiel did as he was told...and then burst into a verse of '[Salvation is Here](http://www.christian-lyrics.net/hillsong-united/salvation-is-here-lyrics.html)'.

Unfortunately the tape player was busted and Sam couldn't pull in a station clearly, so he was forced to listen to the angel singing. Thankfully Castiel didn't have a half-bad voice. 

Castiel finished that song and segued into '[King of Glory](http://www.christian-lyrics.net/third-day/king-of-glory-lyrics.html)'.

After a few minutes of that song Sam was losing it. "Don't you know anything else?" 

"Yes, I do!" Castiel launched into '[God's Mighty Wonders](http://www.cyberhymnal.org/htm/g/m/w/gmwonder.htm)'.

Sam floored it, he wanted to get back to Bobby's as quick as possible before he ripped out Castiel's larynx. After Castiel began the song for a second time, Sam had had it. "How about something more...modern."

"Amazing Grace, how sweet the sound...."

"NO!"

"Just for that, I will no longer sing for you, Sam Winchester!"

Sam was grinding his teeth again. "My luck is changing." Thankfully, for the next 20 minutes, there was nothing but silence.

**~~~~~~~~**

Sam parked and flew out of the car, running upstairs and shutting the door to the bedroom. "Why do these things always happen to me?" he wondered aloud. "Dean never had this; he got blondes and redheads. I get werewolves, horny doctors, two-faced demons and...doped-up angels." He then chastised himself. "Not fair, Sam. Madison doesn't fit into the _evil women you've slept with_ category."

The door opened and Castiel walked in, kicked off his shoes, tore off his jacket and tie, and ripped open his shirt, buttons flying everywhere. "I'm so hot, Sam." It was no lie; he was sweating. "I need...please, Sam, help me." His demeanor had changed since they had left the bar, and he sat on the bed and stared up at Sam, total desperation in his eyes.

"Don't be scared." Sam sat beside him, hoping to offer some non-sexual comfort. "There's nothing to be afraid of, I promise you."

"Why did they do this to me?" Castiel was looking to him for answers. "I did nothing to them."

"I don't know, Cas, but we'll think of something to help you."

"It hurts," Castiel bit at his lip, "it hurts so much."

"What does?" Sam followed Castiel's eyes and saw the angel's cock was swollen within his pants. "Oh boy."

"Help me, Sam."

"Castiel...um, you can...you do know how to mast...."

"HELP ME!" 

Sam saw a lightning bolt strike in front of the house. "Okay," he squeaked. 

Castiel undid his pants and stood, allowing them to fall, his boxers following, and he lay down on the bed. "I do know how to masturbate, Sam, but I don't think that is going to be enough."

"Why should it be?" Sam half-laughed. "But Cas, how will you know if you don't try?"

"Why do you and your brother insist on calling me 'Cas'? It has spread to the Heavens, starting with Anna."

"I don't know," Sam answered honestly, "and in the grand scheme of things, I think there are priorities, and that isn't one of them."

"I must concur." Castiel reached down and fisted his cock with his right hand, slowly pumping it up and down. He took Sam's hand in his left, and placed it upon the other. "Sam...."

They both stroked, the pace slow and easy, but it was Sam who moved faster, Sam who was getting wildly turned on. After a few minutes he couldn't help himself and shifted to lie beside the angel. "I hope God forgives me," he murmured. 

"For what?" Castiel almost moaned. 

"For this." Sam turned Castiel's face to his and pulled him into a deep, long kiss. Castiel's breathing was faster, and the two men stroked quicker, Castiel moaning and shooting his load over the two of them. "I am most likely going to the pit for that."

Castiel caught his breath. "Then I will have to raise you from Perdition as well." He glanced between Sam's legs. "Take off your clothing, Sam."

"Why?"

"As I told you," Castiel undid the button of Sam's jeans, "I want you inside of me."

"We need a wet cloth!" Sam jumped off the bed and ran to the bathroom, staring in the mirror. "You had to take him to a bar, didn't you? You couldn't take him to a movie or for a snack." He washed his hands, wet a cloth and wrung it out. "If you tell him no, he's going to suffer." A deep breath. "You tell him yes and Dean will kill you." 

"Sam?"

Sam turned to Castiel, noticed his cock was swollen again, and tossed him the cloth. "Get cleaned up."

Castiel did and tossed the cloth in the sink. "I'm sorry for being ignorant, for being stupid and gullible." He backed out of the bathroom, lay on the bed and picked up the camera, toying with it before putting it back down and curling on his side. 

'You're a terrific martyr, Castiel,' Sam thought, standing there for a moment before making his way across the room. He sat beside Castiel and rubbed his back. "And I am **definitely** going to Hell for this." He slid his arm around Castiel and turned him onto his back.

"You're naked."

"And you're observant." Sam leaned down and kissed him. "Was Jimmy...did he like....?"

"He loved his wife, Sam, and no, there were never any men in his life." Castiel paused. "I, on the other hand, have experience."

"Tomorrow you can tell me all about Sodom and Gomorrah," Sam shifted between his legs, "but tonight..." he smiled as he held up the tube, "...tonight is for you." He flipped the cap and squeezed some lube on his fingers. "This might hurt a little." He slid one finger inside, while his other hand moved up and down along the thickened shaft. "Feel good?" A moan. "I'll take that as a yes." A second finger moved inside and Castiel clenched. 

"Sam...."

"Cas, you may have done this, but that vessel of yours hasn't." Sam began to remove his fingers, but they were dragged back in. "I guess you like it." Sam jerked him off a little faster, and had three fingers inside before he knew it. "I can't...Cas, my turn to need...." He pulled out his fingers and glanced up at Castiel, who had lube on his own fingers. "You're better than a boy scout." Sam nearly blew his load the moment Castiel touched him, and quickly pulled his hand away. "That's fine." He pulled one of Castiel's legs over his shoulder and rested his dick against his hole. "Ready?"

"Very much so."

"Hell, here I come." Sam moved inside slowly, hearing a groan from Castiel. "Too much? Should I stop?"

"If you stop, Sam, I'll send you to Perdition myself!"

"That's a clear no." Sam expected some resistance but got none; Castiel was open to him, moving with him, and Sam sped up; Castiel met each downward thrust with an upward movement. Sam was fucking him harder and the moment he took Castiel's cock in his fist, Sam felt Castiel's ass clenching hard, like a vise. He held out as long as he could, wanting to keep the pleasure going, and with a literal shriek, Castiel came. Sam lost it, coming with a loud moan, lost in the moment. It took him a while to catch his breath, to say something, and when he could finally articulate, all that came out was a softly sighed, "Castiel...." He didn't get a response and couldn't help his laugh - Castiel had passed out. "I'll thank you proper in the morning." He kissed the angel and slid from him slowly, cleaning them both up. As a precaution he checked Castiel's pulse and it was the norm for a human. He lay down and pulled the sheet over them, holding Castiel in his arms. 

"Dean is so going to kill me."

Sam drifted off, ignorant of the fact that the camera had been on the whole time and had recorded everything that happened.

**TBC....**


End file.
